THE INFINITE IMPROBABILITY DRIVE
> Powered by improbability. The dancefloor operates on the same principle. Anything can happen. Several things probably will.
SOL · MATESUNIO · CALA D'HORT · IBIZA12·VIII·MMXXVI
GUIDE ENTRY · IBIZA · 12·AUG·2026
LIFE,THE UNIVERSE& EVERYTHING
On the evening of 12 August 2026 the Mediterranean will briefly misplace its sun for sixty-six seconds. Not seen since 1905. We intend to correct that.
Attendance is encouraged; reattendance, statistically, is not.
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> If you happen to find yourself in Cala d'Hort, on Ibiza, on the evening of Wednesday 12 August 2026 — and many of you should at least try — the Unio Hotel will be the somewhat unlikely venue for an event whose central feature is the absence, for sixty-six seconds, of the sun.38°58′ N · 1°26′ E
§ II · THE_MOMENT
20:32 CEST · 66 SECONDS OF DARK SEA, COLD AIR, STARS.
> The Moon persuades the Sun to step aside for sixty-six seconds. The temperature drops, the gulls go quiet, and a number of grown adults will behave in ways they later struggle to account for. The eclipsed sun falls 38° to the right of Es Vedrà, low on the horizon, minutes before sunset.
§ IV · THE_ROOMS
// THE SIX ROOMS
> Six rooms, named after a number of well-loved fictional places that the Guide considers, on balance, to be only mildly fictional.
DEEP THOUGHT
> Seven and a half million years to reach forty-two. Ours will see you immediately — and has been thinking about your question for longer than it is prepared to say.
THE PAN-GALACTIC GARGLE BLASTER
> The best drink in existence. Like having your brains smashed out by a slice of lemon wrapped round a large gold brick. Adjustments have been made.
MILLIWAYS
> For the diner who has already been everywhere else. Faces west over the Mediterranean. At 20:32 the view improves without warning.
THE TOTAL PERSPECTIVE VORTEX
> The original drove its only occupant completely mad. This version involves acrobats and a view from a height that produces a not entirely dissimilar feeling.
MOSTLY HARMLESS
> The Guide's entry for Earth was Harmless. A later editor amended it to Mostly Harmless. This room arrives at the same conclusion.
§ VI · INVITATION
// AN INVITATION, OF SORTS
> If you happen to find yourself in Cala d'Hort, Ibiza, on the evening of 12 August 2026 — and many of you should try — the Unio Hotel will be the venue for an event whose central feature is the absence, for sixty-six seconds, of the sun.
> Tickets and accommodation links coming soon.
§ III · THE_NIGHT
// THE NIGHT
> The Guide proposes the following sequence of events, on the understanding that the evening will, as evenings do, take its own view.
- 18:00Arrival. Drinks appear.
- 19:39First contact. The light thins. Glasses on.
- 20:32Totality. Sixty-six seconds of dark sea, cold air, and stars.
- 20:33Daylight returns, slightly embarrassed.
- 20:53Sunset, still partially covered, into the Mediterranean.
- 21:00 →The six rooms open.
- LATECoffee. Quiet. The people you watched it with.
§ I · THE_FACTS
// THE FACTS
> The Guide has, accordingly, prepared the following.
- VENUE
- Unio Hotel · Cala d'Hort · Ibiza
- DATE
- Wednesday 12 August 2026
- TOTALITY
- 20:32 CEST · 66 seconds
- SUNSET
- 20:53 CEST
- RARITY
- First total solar eclipse over Ibiza in 121 years